


act like you're not in love (but don't lie to yourself)

by Dusty_Skyes



Series: Land, Sea, and Sky [7]
Category: The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: AU - Everyone lives, Angst, Blood, I am so so so sorry for this, M/M, Mutual Pining, Suicide Attempt, Teba is not in the right mind, Unrequited Love, communicating is really important
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-10-11 16:51:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10469691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dusty_Skyes/pseuds/Dusty_Skyes
Summary: It begins when two brilliant Rito don't communicate at all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Oh gods blood, I am so sorry for this. I started this not intending for it to go this way, so I'm just going to apologize now and accept the bricks you throw at me. 
> 
> Title has no hidden meaning.

     It begins when two brilliant Rito don't communicate at all.

     “Did I hear you right?” Teba asks as his mind skids to a halt, caught somewhere between the desire to scream and the urge to beat his head against the nearest wall. His beak is probably hanging open ungracefully, but he doesn't care; it's perfectly appropriate in _this_ situation.

     Kass sighs. “Please Teba. You're the only one I can trust to do this. We won't be gone long, just a few weeks at most.”

     “Exactly!” the white-feathered Rito nearly shrieks. “Weeks! I can't leave the village for a few weeks! I have duties!”

     “Too late for that, Teba. I already cleared it with the elder and he said that I could request you as a traveling companion.”

     “ _WHAT?!_ ” Teba shrieks, because to hell with his cool and unruffled reputation; spending a few weeks traveling with Kass is _going to be literal hell_. He's going to wake up completely erect while on the road after dreaming about Kass and _Teba_ _does not want to explain that to him_. At all. “Well, too bad! I'm not doing it!” He regrets the words as soon as they're out of his mouth, as soon as he can see Kass' face already falling, but he can't take them back and he whirls around and storms back into his home, slamming the door behind him. Only when he is certain that Kass can't hear him does he bury his face in his wings and scream in muffled frustration.

     This is a literal nightmare. Furious with himself, Teba snatches up the nearest object, a tacky vase he'd been given a few years back, and hurls it at the wall. It shatters against it with a satisfying crash and he blindly reaches for another thing to throw.

     He can't do this.

     Another object shatters and the Rito snarls, just as furious, and reaches for one more. Along the wall is a fairly large pile of battered items and shattered shards of glass. It's going to be a bitch to clean up later, but he really doesn't care right now. His head's a mess and he's so disgusted with himself and he can't even do a _friendship_ right.

     Halfway through swinging his arm forward, Teba's gaze focuses on the item in his hand and he jerks, instantly aborting the throw. It's a pretty teapot, inked with lilies and roses, and it was something Kass brought back from his travels all those years ago. Teba had been given it on his birthing day. It's precious to him, one of the few things Kass has ever given him that last and _he can't break this_. The teapot tumbles out of his hand and the Rito frantically tries to catch it.

     The teapot shatters against the floor by his feet, spreading white and blue and red shards across the floor and Teba collapses to his knees by the remains.

     It's a stark comparison to the friendship he has just ruined, and—

     Teba slowly gets up, leaves his home with a jerky, false sense of motion, and glances around. He needs to speak to Kass. At least apologize for his actions before he leaves and the Rito sniffs the air. Kass's scent is faint and he follows it towards the nearest waterfall.

     There, collapsed along the edge and crying into his wing-feathers, is Kass. His sobs are broken and hitched, indicating that he has been crying a while now. _He did this_ , Teba realizes, and something inside him breaks into pieces. Just like the teapot. He turns away and flees back to his home.

(Sometimes Teba wonders why he still exists.

He picks up one of the razor-sharp remains of the teapot and breathes in slowly.)

**oOo**

     Kass, on the other hand, is probably ready to cry. He'd requested Teba because it was the only chance he'd have to spend quite a bit of time with the other Rito. Really, he should have known better; should have know that Teba would never agree and he hates how much he craves the other's affection.

     When Teba slams the door in his face, Kass chokes back a broken sob and flees down the hill and heads for the entrance of Rito Village. If he can just hide or disappear or even drown in a pond; _anything_ so he doesn't have to think about how horrified Teba had been at the thought of them spending days on the road together. He heads for a nearby waterfall and crumples by it, pressing his face into his wings as he cries.

     He doesn't need to be reminded of the fact that Teba could never love him the way Kass loves him. Why he went and fell in love with the prickliest, grouchiest Rito in the village, Kass will never know, but he did and now he's suffering for it. A hitch in his sobs brings quiet, and in that split second, Kass' sharp hearing picks up the faintest sound of claws upon rocks. He breathes in sharply, scents the wind that is shifting around him, and can taste _despairgriefpainself-hatred_ , all under-laid with the mingled sensation of righting a wrong. It's a talent he's never told anyone about, and it's saved his life many times while traveling. If the emotion is strong enough, he can taste it in the air.

     Kass stumbles to his feet. He doesn't know why Teba was here, but the other probably saw him crying, and Kass really doesn't like the sudden jumble of emotions that the white-feathered Rito was experiencing. If he's being completely honest with himself, he has a horrible feeling about this.

     Walking isn't fast enough and panic blooms in his chest. Cursing in the ancient tongue, Kass spreads his wings and takes to the sky, tracking Teba's path. It's still clear, the emotions so strong that the trail hasn't faded in the least, and it frightens him.

     There's a dark, underlying promise to remove something tainted from the world. Kass has the terrible, gut wrenching sensation that Teba is referring to himself.

     He touches down in front of Teba's home. The door in front of him is open, which in itself is odd, merely because Teba tends to close and lock it behind him whenever he leaves. Terror clogs up his throat and Kass frantically scents the wind again. The same emotions as before hang heavily in the air, but this time it's nearly overwhelmed by the stench of blood.

     Kass' heart just about stops in his chest and he bolts inside. One wall is lined with glass shards and broken objects, and he glances at it quickly before looking away. In the center of the room, he finds Teba.

     The white-feathered Rito is silent, curled up on the floor near the remains of a teapot Kass had once given him long ago. He's a bit surprised that the other still has it, mainly because Teba had been mildly offended by the gift. For a moment, Kass thinks he threw it, but another look and the orientation of the shards tells him it was dropped.

     He drops to his knees by Teba's form, carefully avoids the shards, and gingerly reaches out for a wing. It's wet and Kass jerks his own back, blanching when he realizes that his pale blue feathers are stained in red. His heart claws its way up his throat and Kass blanches when he spots the puddle of blood underneath Teba's crossed wrists. It's slowly growing larger.

     Frantic, Kass scoops Teba up and bolts towards his bedroom, gingerly spreading the white-feathered Rito out on his bed before reaching out and inspecting his wrists. They've been slit, the feathers there yanked out and the flesh split, and the blue-feathered Rito is immensely thankful for his travels.

     Once, many years ago, he'd visited the Zora's Domain. There he had learned of their ability to heal with a song. Being a Rito, a species just as capable of voice, he'd immediately requested to learn and had taken to it like a fish to water. He couldn't heal himself, but anyone else was fair game.

     Now he drops his head and presses his beak against Teba's wrists, pours his magic into his voice and croons the words that he had learned, and then laps at the cut, watching with relief as it slowly seals over. Kass only stops the song when the wounds on both wrists have been healed, then chokes on his own relief and breaks into tears once again. He can't believe Teba thought this was right.

     Kass doesn't know what he would do if he was too late. If he actually _lost_ Teba. Grieve and grieve and grieve and probably follow the other when it finally became too much for him to handle.

(He bows his head, still kneeling at the side of Teba's bed, and doesn't move until the white-feathered Rito groans as he returns to consciousness.)

**oOo**

     Golden eyes slowly flicker open and Teba keens faintly in confusion. He remembers retreating to his home, remembers slitting his wrists in an attempt to remove himself from the world, remembers closing his eyes and sinking into meditation so he doesn't have to feel anything as he dies.

     So why is he still alive? Noting that his wrists sting slightly, he slowly shifts his head to the side to look, and feels what little color he has in his feathers drain out at the sight of a furious Kass kneeling beside his bed.

     The blue-feathered Rito blinks at him, then sniffs and wipes the tears from his face. “What in Hylia's name were you thinking, Teba?” he eventually hisses, so furious in a way that Teba hasn't seen in years, and the white-feathered Rito winces at the anger. He deserves it.

     “I...” Teba closes his eyes without finishing the sentence. He doesn't know what he was thinking.

     Kass snarls, sounding more like a Zora than the Rito he actually is, and immediately pulls Teba into a crushing hug. Once more, he breaks into tears. “You can't just leave me like that,” he finally whispers, choking out the words in between sobs. “You're my,” _IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou_ , “best friend and I don't know what I'd do without you. Promise me you won't do this again. Please.”

     Slowly, Teba brings a wing up and wraps it around Kass' shoulder. “I'm sorry,” he finally breathes. “I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I won't do it again. I promise.” _IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou._

**oOo**

     It begins with shadows that consume the world; with darkness that takes and takes and never gives until one has nothing left to give and then they, too, are swallowed up. It begins with orange that courses through their veins like liquid fire, that clouds their vision until they can no longer tell friend from foe. It begins with a taint that eats their flesh and they can no longer recognize themself.

     They don't have a name anymore. Who are they, anyway?

     Everything of who they used to be, they no longer recall. Pain ravages their form but they no longer remember how to speak; the words choke them and steal the air from their lungs. All they are is the tainted orange that _takestakestakes_ and never gives and everything burns.

     r̷͈̒͜ė̸̡͝d̴̞̅ ̷̺̎͝ą̵̳̕n̴͖̝͝d̴̮̲̂̈́ ̴̘̓̑ḇ̸͛̆l̶̗̏͒ų̴̲͠e̷͖͐ ̶͓͂a̷̰͆̓ň̸͇̓d̵͈͗͘ ̶̙̑w̵͚͊͝h̷͓̯̄̈́i̸̟͙t̵̎̋ͅẹ̵͎̆̔ ̸̢̍̍ả̸̝̤̾n̸̬̄d̵̙̆ ̸̖͖͂͝o̶̗̖̓͠r̴̬̮̃a̸̲͠n̶̳̝͒g̶̼̙͒e̴̼̩͋

     Ẉ̴̬̇̒h̴̘̅i̷̱͆t̷̮͊͊ĕ̴̥̚ exists. It is the opposite of black; the shade of the sun that sears their eyes and blinds them, forcing them to retreat to the shadow of the water. It is the color of their flesh, mostly transparent enough so that the ooze of color shows through. They are camouflage, their body melting and shifting and reshaping itself so that it lives.

     O̴͚͓̊r̴̮͐a̸̘̘͑̀n̷̡͐͋ģ̶̰̒̎e̶͚̊ is known. It is the fire that burns their lungs and sears them from the inside out. It is the blood that oozes out of them, staining the liquid that they drown in again and again and again and they cannot think straight, much less breathe and—

     B̶̝́ḻ̴̰̓u̶͓̓͆e̵̙̓̆ is remembered. Blue is the water they swim in, breathing and hiding and tracking and hunting until they are satisfied with the amount of red they have spread. Blue is the never-ending darkness that bubbles within themself; that spills their flesh and makes them howl with agony. Blue is the being; he who stands against them with twigs that stab and shock. Blue are the beings; they stand strong against them with sticks that bring nothing but pain.

     R̷̙̗̈́ḛ̴̯̆ḍ̴̿ is recalled. Red is the blood that they spill, rending and ripping it from bone until their claws are covered and their stomach fed. Red is the face of anger, hatred, and rage; the only things they can feel. Red is the being; he who stands strong against them with a weapon that hurts. Red is the being; she who stands strong against them with a weapon that gouges.

     They are the hunter. They are not used to being the hunted. _They do not like it_.

     Elimination is the answer. They will remove the red and the blue. They will remove all of it.

     They hunt, their body melting into shadows and darkness and water and _blueblueblue_ _tainttainttaint_ that steals the breath from their lungs until they feel like they're drowning and a _redredred_ that _hurthurtshurts_.

     W̷͈̫͖̠̍̆̋ẖ̷̢̊́̕͝ò̷̞͊ ̶͕a̶͕͈̩̒r̸̹̰̖̃͛͘͜ĕ̶̩͉̫̮̿ ̵͖̣̫̈́̑͋ẗ̷̛̻͈́h̵̞̩͓͖̅̆̒͑ĕ̷͎̑͗y̷̜͖̘̑̏̕?̷̖͚̿͒̓

     They used to know who.

     Now they don't.

     There's movement above their lurking form. White and blue and within easy reach.

     S̴̢̖̜̭̦̲̼̤̠͖̝̃͋̉̉̋o̵̡̧͔͚̼̺̭̳̙̔̔̍͒͂͋̍͂͊ ̷̗̣̘̬̙̰̥̹̍̾̓̾̄͒̔̐̆̈́̚͝ _h̴̢̧̡͎̬̟̤̜͖͉͙͎͆̊͋̾̐̑́͜u̶̖͑̏͒̽͌̈́̈́̉̃͜͠͝n̸̢̿̓̏͌͛̅̆̔ģ̷͖̱͉̬̰͔͎̣̬̩̤͓̍̐̾ͅr̶̢̺̟̘̟̳̩̾͒̍y̸̧̡͖͓̭̳̳̌_.̶̡̢͙͕̙͉̳̟̫͉̘̱̻̓̿̑͋̅͑̋̚̕͜͠

 


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